i am numbed

received a phone call from my elder brother at 1:30 this morning. unless it is an overseas call, the phone ringing in the wee hours in the morning will never bring good news. never has and never will be.

i was the first person to be informed. my father had another stroke attack on the (good) left side of the brain, while still lying unconscious recovering from sunday's operation. while the much-needed good news trickled in despairingly, bad news seems to barge in like a runaway locomotives. the neurosurgeon explained that if my father survived the ordeal, and that in itself is a big IF, chances of normal mobility and speech is even thinner than wafer.

and yet i'm still here in the office writing this entry, instead of my way back to my hometown. i need to submit the application forms for alyssa and amelya's kindy for next year. and that %^*&%^^&* 1 month-old front loading machine failed us. wifey found out yesterday evening after it finished the complete cycle of washing athyra's clothes, it decided that everyone in this world is a child. it's child-proof door simply won't budge. and it doesn't have a manual release. so we have to wait for somebody from the shop to prise open the door or i'll be an instant fungus and mushroom breeder in the estimated one-week homecoming time.

i will be there, hopefully sooner rather than later.

inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi roji'un.